The ten indicators of unconsciousness


  1. You’re not conscious when you do the same thing that doesn’t work over and over again.
  2. Consicousness is absent where there is blaming
    Blaming is relinquishing responsibility and assigning it to someone else
  3. One is not conscious when you make excuses
  4. One is not conscious if one uses the word “you” in talking to another person about themself
    Generalizations like, people like to…
  5. One is really not conscious when one describes the character and the motivation of another person
  6. Believing that your experience is reality is unconsciousness
  7. Believing that you live in the present is unconsciousness
    We all live in memory. Every moment is the experience of the past.
  8. Believing that others experience things the way you do is unconsciousness
  9. Devalue those who dont experience things the way you do is unconscious
  10. Believing that you are autonomous – separate and self sufficient is unconscious

    Plenary address by Harville Hendrix at the AIRT Imago Conference, Chicago, Oct 1993

When to seek couple counselling

Marriage rates supposedly are on the decline. While it’s an oft-repeated statistic that 50 percent of first marriages end in divorce, that number has remained unchanged for the past 30 years. Divorce rates also vary with the partners’ level of education, religious beliefs, and many other factors. But when divorce …

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Recovering from divorce

If you’re having trouble letting go: There is life after this marriage As hard as it is to believe right now, one day this marriage will just be something you did once. You’ll go on and you’ll have what you create. Get out of denial Ask yourself: Do you really …

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